Later...

Okay, just now getting back to thi. My DAUGHTER, Lola Roux Malizia, is almost 3 months old and I have embarked on the trippiest journey known to mankind. That's the thing with human life, we all feel like we are experiencing each thing for the first time, that's why Joseph Campbell called us the hero with 1000 faces. So true. We are all doing it for the first time on the planet.
Well, as everyone who has been through it before knows, the birth didn't turn our the way I had planned. I know why, too. B/c I really needed a good ass kicking. I was getting really squirrelly toward the end there with my fears of all things western and such. I pushed for 6 hours at the natural birth center and they finally had to call it, they told me that I had to be transferred to the hospital, I had a cesaerean. I want to document the whole story:
It was Sunday night when I started having contractions (6/17/07) they were totally fine, not a big deal. I thought it might be fake, so I wasn't getting too upset about it. Then Monday morning, something was definitely happening so Joel called in to work. We set up laboring stations around the house and tried all kinds of different positions. Joel was timing the contractions and writing them down. Around 4:00 that afternoon, we called the midwife. She said we could meet her there at 6pm. I couldn't wait for 6pm!! So, we went to the birth center and met her. I wan't dialated enough to be admitted, so she said we could go out to the water and walk with knees lifted high and then walk sideways up and down the stairs for 30 minutes to try and dialate me more. We did it and it worked! I was admitted around 8pm and the contractions were bad enough to stop me from walking. She said I could go back out for another exercise session to move things along or I could ret, but resting wouldn't make things go any faster. So we went out for another session. While we were out there, one of my coworkers called Joel's phone!! I totally hated her at that moment b/c she told Joel to have me give a good push for her. What a tool.
That's when it really started to suck. I don't remember it very clearly, but some time in the night, my mom showed up and I made her stay in the other room. It just sucked to be the only one in the room experiencing this while everyone stared at me. I didn't want her staring, too. I hit transition sometime in the wee hours of the morning, that's when the midwife broke my water, meconium presence. I started pushing around 9am. I tried the tub, the tug of war thing, squatting (with watermelon ankles) anything and everything to get the baby out.